Brighter days may be around the corner, but today the best I can do for you’s is to recall the past, which very well may be today, what the fock.

Yeah yeah, when I’m seventy-three, like the other day for fock’s sake, November 6, a birthdate I share with Agrippina the Younger, Suleiman the Magnificent, Adolphe Sax and John Philip Sousa (“The March King” who wrote one march about a thousand times over).īut here’s my deal: I’m presently out-of-sorts with some kind of medical condition, again, some kind of post Daylight Savings Time stress-PDSTS, ask your focking doctor about it like the TV suggests, for christ sakes.

So yeah, I had a what-you-call a birthday just the other day (cold hard cash is always appreciated), and here’s a little story of such a day:Ī young girl says to her mom, “Instead of buying me clothes for my birthday, can you send them to all the other girls that haven’t got any? Whoa Nellie! That’s a nice run, I don’t care who you are, ain’a? And that was back 5,000 years ago when health insurance was just a shyster’s dream, I kid you not. Seems to me that back there in your 1967, youngish songwriters imagined that a physical age of 64 should be considered to be goddamn Methuselah-esque, who, by the by, according to sources cited in the Bible, died at the age of 969 years old. “Will you still need me / will you still feed me / When I’m sixty-four”įeed me? Like I’m some kind of hungry potted plant out of Little Shop of Horrors? Backoff caregiving asshole, I’m perfectly capable to sprinkle the Metamucil upon my breakfast bowl of Grape focking Nuts all by myself. Haven’t had the courage to lend an ear to this manufactured opus as of yet, in fear that maybe we got another good-golly-Miss Molly-awful spin on “Paperback Writer,” “Yellow Submarine, “When I’m 64” on our futuristic hands, what the fock. I’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a? So listen, I heard the Fab Four (Fab Two?) finally put out a new tune, “Now and When,” so’s to slake America’s thirst for more Brit-pop one-two-three-four.

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